Coping With Suffering as A Christian Part 2

Last time, we began unpacking what it means to suffer, and we left halfway through 1 Peter 3:14-17. Let us keep reading for a more in-depth look at suffering. To remember where we left off, we will start with an example of my suffering and where my faith is.

In my issues with my husband, that is where I am now. I have left all the troubles at Jesus’ feet. Let go, forgiven my husband, and letting Jesus heal individually. My HOPE and FAITH is that Jesus’ will repair the damage that has been done and reunite us for an even better marriage. This will bring God glory, a living testimony of what His love and graciousness is. Only He can heal, restore, and resurrect anything that is impossible and dead. Only God can bring it all back to life, the way it is supposed to be.

This flows into the next verse: ‘Having a good conscience; that, whereas they speak evil of you, as of evildoers, they may be ashamed that falsely accuse your good conversation in Christ.’ You may be thinking, ‘you are crazy! The marriage is over, why would you want that evil thing back?’ This is my faith and hope in Jesus.

Because Jesus said in John 14:13-14 – And whatever you ask in My name, that I will do, that the Father may be glorified in the Son. If you ask anything in My name, I will do it. “If you love Me, keep My commandments. And I will pray to the Father, and He will give you another Helper, that He may abide with you forever— the Spirit of truth, whom the world cannot receive, because it neither sees Him nor knows Him; but you know Him, for He dwells with you and will be in you.

 Jesus will do whatever we ask in His name to glorify God through the Son. And He repeats it saying whatever we ask, He will do, if we love Him, keep His commandments. He will pray to God and the Holy Spirit will be with us. For Jesus to resurrect my marriage, means that reconciliation has happened, which is a living testimony of what God’s mercy, grace, forgiveness and love truly is. God would be glorified in this situation.

At the end of this scripture, Peter states that …’it is better, if the will of God be so, that ye suffer for well doing, than for evil doing.’ During sorrow, we should strive to do good according to God’s will, rather than giving in to evil. Sometimes, our grief is brought on by our choices.

We make a bad choice in purchasing a house to how we interact with other people. Or we pick up that bottle of beer to drown out our sorrows. We need a clear conscience to distinguish between good and bad actions. To know that we are doing what is right, we must be in constant prayer and meditating in God’s word.

Overcoming Adversity

Revelation 2:10-11 – 10 Do not fear any of those things which you are about to suffer. Indeed, the devil is about to throw some of you into prison, that you may be tested, and you will have tribulation ten days. Be faithful until death, and I will give you the crown of life. 11 “He who has an ear, let him hear what the Spirit says to the churches. He who overcomes shall not be hurt by the second death.”’

John states here we are not to be afraid of anything that causes us to suffer. So, when we experience sickness, especially a severe illness, we tend to grow fear, for many reasons: death, loss of work, loss of finances, or do not want to give it to anyone else (if it is contagious).

Just to be clear, Revelation is a book of prophecy, the end times and what is going to happen in the spirit realm as well as here on earth. However, I believe that this scripture falls into some things we deal with now. It says the devil is about to throw some of you into prison that you may be tested…We know that a physical, earthly prison is the place that we lock up criminals and punish them for the crimes they have committed. There are innocent people that go to the penitentiary as well, because of false accusations and lack of evidence.

The devil, Satan, is an accuser and a liar. He does not want any of God’s children to be fruitful and does not want them to spread the good news. He wants them to hurt, and in that sorrow, blame God; grow hate and anger because it seems so hard to bear. But the secret power God has given us is to continue to be joyful in the grief, praising God anyway.

It says at the end of verse ten …’ Be faithful until death, and I will give you the crown of life.’ Even if we die in the suffering, Jesus is still with us, we must keep our faith. We only need faith that is the size of a mustard seed (see Mark 4:30-32 and Luke 13:18-19). Faith is the backbone of Jesus’ teaching. We may not see the other side of our suffering, but if we hold onto the faithfulness that is required of us, Jesus will see it though. We do not know what He is fighting on the spiritual side, or what demons He is battling for us, so we must hold strong.

In verse eleven, he states we must have ears to hear. What does that mean? Of course we have ears, so we do hear, right? Maybe. We must be willing to hear the Holy Spirit, which you will hear deep inside of yourself. So, just because you hear your surroundings, does not mean you are hearing what scripture says, what the still small voice is saying inside of you or what the pastor is saying.

Pay attention because the Holy Spirit is speaking to the churches. The churches are not buildings, they are us, those inside the building, listening to the sermons. In this same token, listen, and hear, because we are going to overcome the suffering, we must hear to know what we must do.

Living by the Spirit and Not the Flesh

Romans 8:12-17 – 12 Therefore, brethren, we are debtors—not to the flesh, to live according to the flesh. 13 For if you live according to the flesh you will die; but if by the Spirit you put to death the deeds of the body, you will live. 14 For as many as are led by the Spirit of God, these are sons of God.

15 For you did not receive the spirit of bondage again to fear, but you received the Spirit of adoption by whom we cry out, “Abba, Father.” 16 The Spirit Himself bears witness with our spirit that we are children of God, 17 and if children, then heirs—heirs of God and joint heirs with Christ, if indeed we suffer with Him, that we may also be glorified together.

We all have spiritual debt and must learn to live according to the spirit, not the flesh. Any kind of decision made in the flesh can be harmful and will distract and can even destroy us on so many levels. This includes suffering. When we are in the middle of the anguish, we must not look at what we can see, but look to God, who we do not see. In this way, we must push all negativity aside during this time and focus on the goodness of God, so that we can live each day in peace. We must let God lead us. That means, we must be in prayer and meditating in the bible daily.

In anguish, we can face fear, which is a form of bondage. It paralyzes us in the things unseen that we do not understand and cannot trust because we do not see. But, when we cry out to God to help, He comforts us and gives reassurance that He is taking care of the matter.

The Holy Spirit is our witness to our cause and goes before us to defend us in God’s courtroom. We are God’s heirs, and unfortunately, we will suffer in many ways because of this. But there is hope, because in that suffering, God is glorified and when we make it to Heaven, we will be glorified as well.

A Reflection on God’s Mercies

2 Corinthians 1:3-7 – 3 Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, 4 who comforts us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort those who are in any trouble, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.

5 For as the sufferings of Christ abound in us, so our consolation also abounds through Christ. 6 Now if we are afflicted, it is for your consolation and salvation, which is effective for enduring the same sufferings which we also suffer. Or if we are comforted, it is for your consolation and salvation. 7 And our hope for you is steadfast, because we know that as you are partakers of the sufferings, so also you will partake of the consolation.

While we wait for the healing or breakthrough, we must also be a comfort to others. Because we are going through our issues, we can help others facing the same or similar circumstances. They can see the hope and joy you have and see Jesus in this. You can be a great witness to bring God’s glory to others, witness to them and guide them in the sinner’s prayer. Sometimes, God puts suffering on us, as a test, to see if we will continue to praise and thank Him (see the book of Job).

Suffering is a hardship. It is hard mentally, physically, and spiritually. It can be draining, and we do not always know how we will feel from day to day. We tend to think too much about the situation (mental), become sick or have physical symptoms from distress (illnesses or stress headaches). We can even become mad at God for allowing these circumstances to harm us. In my current situation, I have been on the roller coaster of all of this.

Thinking too much and reacting in ways I should not have, which pushed my husband further and further from me. I have given myself headaches from the stress and physically sick to my stomach with a loss of appetite for weeks due to the grieving loss of my marriage, then emotional eating on the other side. And finally, I have suffered spiritually, asking God why and reminding Him of our covenant and vows. To open my husband’s blind eyes and make him see, while I am ugly crying and yelling, just so broken hearted.

I hope this message makes sense to you. Can you believe we still have a little more to uncover? Who knew that something like this would be so deep? Stay tuned for Part 3.

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Coping With Suffering as A Christian Part 1

We all suffer in so many areas. Suffering also means something different from one person to the next. According to the Oxford Dictionary, suffering is “the state of undergoing pain, distress, or hardship.” How are we supposed to deal with this sorrow?

Philippians 1:29 (KJV) – For unto you it is given in the behalf of Christ, not only to believe on him, but also to suffer for his sake

James 5:13-15 (KJV) – 13 Is any among you afflicted? let him pray. Is any merry? let him sing psalms. 14 Is any sick among you? let him call for the elders of the church; and let them pray over him, anointing him with oil in the name of the Lord: 15 And the prayer of faith shall save the sick, and the Lord shall raise him up; and if he has committed sins, they shall be forgiven him.

In this series, we are going to find out what it means to go through suffering, really understand what it is and what is happening during this hurtful time in our lives.

  • What is suffering?
  • Why do we go through it and what is the purpose?
  • What is happening?
  • What are we supposed to do while enduring this suffering?
  • What happens after?

Keep reading to see this in-depth study on suffering and how God’s Word can help you through this tough time.

What is Suffering?

According to Merriam-Webster Dictionary, suffering is the state or experience of that suffers. So, what does that mean? Merriam-Webster also had other definitions for Suffers: to endure death, pain, or distress. It can also mean to sustain loss or damage and it can also mean to be subject to disability or handicap.

Wow! I see that, in layman’s terms, suffering is painful and stressful on all levels.

According to the bible, suffering is a blessing. We can suffer for doing God’s will. We can suffer from false accusations, which Satan will do what he can to imprison us. But, in this suffering, we are glorified in Jesus. In these sufferings, we also are to give comfort and hope.

Study Scriptures: 1 Peter 3:14-17, Revelation 2:10-11, Romans 8:12-17, 2 Corinthians 1:3-7

You may be wondering, if I am doing God’s will, why am I suffering? Why am I dealing with this pain or loss? What could possibly be the reason for God to permit this?

Why do We Go through it and What is the Purpose?

Suffering is hard. It is a part of life though. Everyone is different and handles it in their own way. This type of sorrow for you might be trying to make ends meet each payday just so you have necessary utilities paid and food on the table. To another person it is a loss of a close person or even a home during a natural disaster. Still another person may be in misery through cancer treatments each week.

As of late, suffering for me has been a sense of loss and loneliness. I have been in anguish through many trials in my life, but right now, the hardest is the loss of my marriage of nearly fourteen years, family disowning me based on one side of a story and the loneliness I feel in it all. My husband decided to keep the house we bought, while I opted to purchase a house in a small town. This new house is conveniently located about 45 minutes away from both our home and my workplace, which translates to a distance of approximately thirty miles to either destination.

So, why do we go through this torment? Let us look at the study scriptures for this series, in 1 Peter, Revelation, Romans and 2 Corinthians.

Walking in Righteousness: The Blessings and Trials of Suffering

According to 1 Peter 3:14-17 – 14 But and if ye suffer for righteousness’ sake, happy are ye: and be not afraid of their terror, neither be troubled; 15 But sanctify the Lord God in your hearts: and be ready always to give an answer to every man that asketh you a reason of the hope that is in you with meekness and fear: 16 Having a good conscience; that, whereas they speak evil of you, as of evildoers, they may be ashamed that falsely accuse your good conversation in Christ. 17 For it is better, if the will of God be so, that ye suffer for well doing, than for evil doing.

Verse 14 says ‘But and if ye suffer for righteousness’ sake, happy are ye: and be not afraid of their terror, neither be troubled’. What is the meaning of righteousness? It is another word for morality. according to the Merriam-Webster dictionary, it is conduct that conforms to an accepted standard of right and wrong and it is faithfulness to high moral standards. But, according to the King James bible, it is purity of heart and rectitude of life. Conformity of heart and life to the divine law. It applies to God and is the active and passive obedience of Christ. It also means justice and is the cause of our justification.

If we suffer for righteousness’ (morality, purity, justice) we are to be happy. Why would Peter tell us to be happy while we are suffering? It is when we suffer doing what is right in God’s eyes.

In my situation, I fought for my marriage, tried counseling, prayed, fasted, tried to be his friend, and listen and even did the wrong things like I begged, pleaded, started arguments, justified everything, pointed out my faults and his faults, cried, threw tantrums, and shifted blame. NOTHING worked. I was expected to be happy, despite praying, giving it to God, and being my husband’s friend, in my sadness and frustration. That has been hard. And it is hard for anybody. We are not to be afraid or troubled in the face of suffering; instead, we are to be joyful and happy.

Why? Because in verse fifteen it says we are to ‘sanctify God in our hearts’. Webster’s 1828 Dictionary states that sanctify means to cleanse, purify, or make holy. It is also to separate, set apart or appoint to a holy, sacred, or religious use. There are six additional definitions, but they all come down to separation, cleansing and holiness. So, we are to keep God holy, separated, and clean in our hearts during our suffering. I can say in my case there were many times that my heart was not clean because I just wanted my pain over and, in my head, I was willing to do anything to get my husband back, no matter what it took.

When we sanctify God in our hearts, during our suffering, it produces happiness. When you put your trust in Him, you are letting go of the pain, separating your distress from God’s holiness. He is our comforter.

When we do this, we need to be ready to always to give an answer to every man that asks you a reason of the hope that is in you with meekness and fear…People are going to ask why you are smiling and happy when you are in your time of affliction and trouble. You are the salt and light of the world. It is hard, but even in our predicaments, we are to be examples of everything Christ has to offer. They will see the hope that you illuminate.

In my issues with my husband, that is where I am now. I have left all the troubles at Jesus’ feet. Let go, forgiven my husband, and letting Jesus heal individually. My HOPE and FAITH is that Jesus’ will repair the damage that has been done and reunite us for an even better marriage. This will bring God glory, a living testimony of what His love and graciousness is. Only He can heal, restore, and resurrect anything that is impossible and dead. Only God can bring it all back to life, the way it is supposed to be.

This flows into the next verse: ‘Having a good conscience; that, whereas they speak evil of you, as of evildoers, they may be ashamed that falsely accuse your good conversation in Christ.’ You may be thinking, ‘you are crazy! The marriage is over, why would you want that evil thing back?’ This is my faith and hope in Jesus.

Because Jesus said in John 14:13-14 – And whatever you ask in My name, that I will do, that the Father may be glorified in the Son. If you ask anything in My name, I will do it. “If you love Me, keep My commandments. And I will pray to the Father, and He will give you another Helper, that He may abide with you forever— the Spirit of truth, whom the world cannot receive, because it neither sees Him nor knows Him; but you know Him, for He dwells with you and will be in you.

Jesus said that whatever we ask in His name, He will do it, so that God can be glorified through the Son. And He repeats it saying whatever we ask, He will do, if we love Him, keep His commandments. He will pray to God and the Holy Spirit will be with us. For Jesus to resurrect my marriage, means that reconciliation has happened, which is a living testimony of what God’s mercy, grace, forgiveness and love truly is. God would be glorified in this situation.

At the end of this scripture, Peter states that …’it is better, if the will of God be so, that ye suffer for well doing, than for evil doing.’ In other words, during the sorrow, if it is God’s will, that we ache for doing well than to fall to evil choices or actions. Sometimes, our grief is brought on by our choices.

We make a bad choice in purchasing a house to how we interact with other people. Or we pick up that bottle of beer to drown out our sorrows. That is why we must have a good conscience in everything we do and be able to discern when something is bad. To know that we are doing what is right, we must be in constant prayer and meditating in God’s word.

We still have so much more to unpack on this topic. This is only the beginning. Stay tuned for part 2 of this series…

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